Shelter from the Storm

    Shelters have structures.  The story of the three little pigs and the big bad wolf offers us a metaphorical glimpse into the kind of structure that keeps us safe.  As a person, the structure that keeps me safe is my solid self, who oversees my internal family system.  Knowing who I am, what I am capable of, what my frailties are, as well as my place and space in the universe contribute to this solid self and allow me to function.  As a leader, whether as a parent, a friend, a teacher, a writer, or a therapist, coming from this solid grounding allows me help others in both expected and unanticipated ways.  I can both model and help in demonstrating how structure (boundaries) can lead to feelings of safety which in turn becomes security, a shelter.
    For the shelter of society,  structure is often found in institutions, including government.  The government must mirror a solid self, knowing who it is, what it is capable of, its frailties, and space and place in the universe to connect to its individual members.  In our society, government currently is not operating from a solid sense of self, at least the executive branch.  That branch is lead by me, me, me, it's all about me mentality.  One could, I suppose argue, that at least the tweeter in chief knows who he is.  But does he? He is the man who is called the President of the United States, not the man who shouts "you're fired" on tv.  He does not have absolute authority to do whatever he wants in the government as he does in the corporations that he owns.  We citizens are not his employees.  We are his employer.  The President works for the people of America, all of us, each of us, regardless if we voted for him or not.  He is our representative to the world at large in this time and this space and this place and he is an embarrassment in that regard.  His tweets are ludicrous and self-serving and often peppered with incorrect information.  He fires the seeds of dissent through an automatic weapon, dividing us as a nation.  I am incredulous, and have been since Inauguration Day 2017.
    When I am having a difficult time understanding my own self I know I need the help of another mind to work through the issues I have that are preventing that.  But first, I must come to that knowledge.  For institutions and their leaders, I think that is a Herculean task.  Yet, the introspective life is especially important for the elected leaders who allegedly speak for us.  Some do, some don't, and whether they do or not is how closely they are in touch with the understanding that to provide shelter for society, they must think of all of its members, not only themselves.

Amendments

      In the wake of yet another school shooting, this time in Florida, seventeen dead, others injured, I feel compelled to write.  Writing is talking and action is needed but with the writing comes the reading and putting into the universe the energy for the action.  Writing is a step from the thoughts and prayers that while another intentional step in the universe, is less put-it-out-there.  Although, when the event happened, when I watched the aftermath, especially the video of the mother yelling at Trump that he could do something, I cried and I did offer thoughts and prayers.  A first step.  I watched the NY Times GOP Guide to Mass Shootings and shook my head.  A second step.  I thought about past shootings and even potential shootings and wondered how I could help.  What could I say? A third step.  I'll know what I say, because I now will say it.
     I never have owned a gun, although I have shot a bb gun and some kind of pistol when my neighbor took me to the shooting range.  When my husband worked for the police department in the 70's and he brought his gun home, I made sure he stored it high, in a secret turn around book shelf we had, well out of reach of our sons.  I didn't let my sons have toy guns, except in the summer in the form of water pistols.  I figured they had an index finger and thumb if they wanted to play shoot. When I was a child I did play war with a friend up the block who had all of the play things from toy guns to helmets to backpacks.  In my imagination I lobbed grenades and shot up enemy lines. So, I have some familiarity with guns.  Some.
     I understand people have guns for protection (who are they kidding?) as well as hobbies.  Some like to shoot at the range, others to shoot for sport and, like fishermen, dress and eat the animals they shoot.  I have no negative thoughts about people who have guns and use them (or potentially use them) for those reasons.  It's just not for me.  But neither is skydiving or windsurfing or welding or running marathons.  Not that there are too many comparisons across these not-for-me's.
    I believe in the first amendment even though I don't always agree with what people say.  Still, I defend the right to say it.  No brainer.  I don't have to agree to understand the right.  I believe in the second amendment, even though I don't own guns.  Although, and here's a big difference, way back when a gun was a one shot item, often not accurate.  But I'll not debate that.  Let's suspend belief and think the intention was you have a right to own a gun, no matter the potential for killing.  As time evolves, perhaps owning even a nuclear gun will be legitimatized. Ridiculous or foreshadowing? What is the limit?  And now we have the problem to address.  Not do you have a right to own a gun, but what type of gun do you have a right to own?
    For me, weapons of mass destruction in the gun sense are guns that no individual should be permitted to own, nor have access to privately.  You want to take target practice?  Pistol or rifle? No automatic weapon.  No.automatic.weapon.  Oh, you have to reload to often? Whoopsie.  Zen target practice.  You want to hunt? No.automatic.weapon.  You want to be able to eat the animal, not pulverize it.  No.automatic.weapon.  Try a bow to show your real skill.
   Even without automatic weapons changes are still needed to keep guns off the streets, out of the hands of children, out of the hands of mentally ill.  So much need to restore our society to a society not rooted in fear and terror.  We will lose the opportunity to come together as a nation to mourn another school shooting when we lose easy access to all types of weapons and automatic weapons are banned.  Thoughts and prayers are an empty check written on a failed bank.  Our lawmakers must step away from the gun lobby as an addict steps away from drug of choice and enact real gun control laws.  Not blaming shootings on mental health issues, which are separate.  Mental health needs must be addressed.  Gun control issues must be addressed.  Our society deserves better.  Our children deserve a safe place to be every day in school.  EVERY DAY.